Friday, July 20, 2012

Poem #6

6 months that weve been through
6 lines I always say to you
these lines have said what's in my heart
6 lines in hopes we would never part

"Ingats ha," I'd say to show my care
when at your side I could not be there
"See you later" when we would have a date
coz I know when I'm with you, everything's great

"Good morning" in every day of our lives
Coz you were the first thing on my mind
"Good night" when I sleep at night
Hoping when I wake up you'd be by my side

Saying "I miss you" when I want you near
when I miss your hugs and kisses, my dear
"I love you" coz I need you to know
How dear you are to me, and I'll never let go


P.S. Francis Loves Krissy <3

Tuesday, July 17, 2012

Funny, But Annoying

Well, it has been 6 months since I had this relationship with Gwapa (Krismarie Dianne Cezar is her real name). And I find it weird that every time we see one of her friends, some would mistake me for someone, still.

It was funny the first time it happened. I mean, it was just new, like 2nd month, and I understand that they do not know me. But the thing is, it keeps happening and happening. What I hated is that they call me the name of her ex-boyfriend.

This is a boyfriend's dilemma. One does not want to be called by the ex'es name, am I right? I mean, this sucks. I am very different from that scumbag who hurt my girl's heart over and over. I just hate the feeling that you've just been a copycat.

By the way, it's RESTONI, not RICK. It's for a reason that my nickname is TON. And unlike him, I will be the man who will be the opposite of that kid. Instead of leaving, I'd be staying. Instead of hurting, I'd be caressing. Instead of fighting, I'd be the one who understands her.

I'd be the knight who will protect my princess from bandits like him. :)

Shut up homophobic seal. This is serious stuff.

Saturday, July 7, 2012

The Gospel That Captured Who I Am

We (with my family and my cousin) went to the church tonight to attend an Anticipated mass (a mass in a Saturday with Sunday's gospel). And the gospel has hit me. That was Mark 6:1-6.

"And Jesus said to them, 'A prophet is not without honor, except in his own country, and among his own kin, and in his own house.'" -Mark 6:4

This struck me the most. I don't know why, but it came to my mind that it is what I am at home. So, here's my own reflection.

I was prejudged here in my house, like Jesus was in His own birthplace, Jerusalem. I was always the weakest link, the one always pushed forward (sometimes pushed aside), the one always pressured. They see me as someone weaker than my own brother even though I am the eldest. Someone they can call their "kaladkarin" son.

But outside, I was treated different. I am someone worth searching for. The go-to guy. The nice guy. The sweet guy. The corny guy. There's always something in me that makes me who I am.

It's sad that when everyone else you knew wishes you luck in your thesis and encouraging you, your family brings you down and doubting your capabilities. That was what I thought. They keep on seeing me as the one who failed a subject and is doomed to fail again.

But Jesus did the right thing. He still share the wonders of God's love for us. He is willing to give Himself to His hometown even though He knew He will not be accepted. He even healed the sick and performed some miracles.

Can something good come from a man who failed once? I don't know. But there is only one thing I know that I will always do. I will never stop trying to succeed even though my own kin will despise me for that failure.

Wednesday, July 4, 2012

Why Gays are Still Not Accepted By Public

Gays. When you hear one, many would say "eeeeew!" or "damn, straight up, bro".

Do you gays know why you are still not accepted? Then hear this story.

I was walking in the street in the middle of the night to buy some water. I then passed by the local bar as usual, when I saw gays drinking. I was too damn certain that one of them stood up when he (or she, or it) saw me. So as a defense, I quickly pulled my phone and pretended to text. I don't want to have a conversation starter. I didn't see their reaction because seriously, I did not mind them.

After I bought my water, I went back to my boarding house and I could pass by the bar (as I said earlier). I saw four of them on the street, so I quickly pulled my phone. Then I took a straight face. Next thing I knew, they were singing "Chikading Chikading naglupad-lupad". And I know they were referring to me. They even shouted "MAYA!" which means a "closet gay".

For the record, I AM NOT GAY. I do not define myself as one. Just because I suit up like this or just because I'm thin, it makes me a gay, or as you say it, closet gay. I was disgusted because of my ego as an Aries (thanks a lot to my horoscope). I was supposed to be a standard bearer to all men. Then you prejudge me as a gay? The reason they all are prejudged is because they are also prejudging. Remember the golden rule: Do not do unto others what you do not want others to do to you.

I do not hate gays. There are formal gays, who in my own opinion deserves to be accepted. For me, there are no men or women, or gays or lesbians -- there are just people. But what I hate are people who, collectively or individually, annoy my senses. Let's say, these "kanto" gays. They liberally do what they wanted to do without minding the society or the reaction of the people they are interacting with.

What I'm trying to say is that, when you want respect about your identity, learn to respect first your society. Other gays have tried to conform, but with them demoralizing the third gender, it gives me less hopes of them accepted by the society. It's sad to think, but I guess we are losing hope for them. For all those who fight for your rights to be accepted with the right conducts, KUDOS! But these friends of yours needs a high five. On the face. With a chair. Or maybe a bro fist! On the crotch. With Thor's Mjolnir.

Just saying.